His Word, Soul Relationships

20 Years and Change

Someone recently shared with me that we’ve known one another for over 20 years.

Wow…TWENTY years…two decades…

That’s a long time…and, while I’m still in my 30’s, I can say that 20 years is more than half of my life.

Even as I type that, it seems like so much time…

A lot can happen over 20 years…a person can encounter a lot of ‘stuff’ that changes who they are to the core.

Marriage…divorce…having kids…changing jobs…losing parents…life threatening illnesses…

Each of these events, as well as the daily ebb and flow of life, can change a person…for better or worse.

Of the very short list above, I’ve walked through two-thirds of these events. Fortunately, I’ve not lost either of my parents or encountered any life-threatening illnesses.

One thing that has changed me the most is motherhood. Becoming a parent will only change you if you let it. I’ve been a single mom for the entire time I’ve been a mother – almost 10 years. When you become a mother, you realize that it’s no longer about YOU. It’s about them…and what they need from you…and you learn to put your selfish ways on the shelf – or at least you should.

You know what else has had a huge impact on me? Accepting the free gift of salvation from Jesus. Knowing that you don’t have to work your way into heaven sure does take a load off. Between that and motherhood, I am nowhere near the same person I was twenty years ago. Add wisdom from poor choices to the mix, and you get another set of circumstances that can change a person.

As I was reflecting on the last twenty years, it occurred to me that this person has weaved their way in and out of my life this entire time. There would be times that we wouldn’t speak for months and years, and then there would be times where we would check in more frequently. Just a few months ago, I found a picture from 20 years ago that I had to share…and I think we both got a chuckle out of it. {Let’s be real, fashion has come a long way! Thankfully.}

Throughout this 20 years, this time span of two decades, two marriages and five kids between us, and countless broken hearts and unfulfilled hopes and dreams, we have both…

…loved and lost…

…lived through the highest of highs and the lowest of lows…

…and we have both managed to come out on the other side of things able to talk about them…

When, on a random Sunday morning, one text message starts the whole cycle over again, you find that your past and your present and your future are all rolled into one…

And then one day, you look up and someone you met 20 years ago is there…smiling at you, and asking, ‘Where have you been?’

And you just know that your heart has come home.

3 thoughts on “20 Years and Change”

  1. Beautiful reflections. My husband and I will celebrate 25 years of marriage and this has me reflecting much on the life we’ve lived together, the mistakes made, the ways we’ve grown, the ways He has changed us. It hasn’t been easy but God has been with us through it all and we’ve come out stronger and more dependent on Him. And I love that He never stops growing us and changing us. What an amazing God we serve. It was a delight to visit you today. Blessings.

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